Travel Tracks ~ *SUCH A DEAL - AGAIN* by Dave Heron

Lal Dadrah of Amritsar India graduated from the school of hard knocks last week with two very valuable lessons that will probably stick around a while.
The first was that mid-November's not a particularly great time of year to visit Birmingham UK.
The second was that if obsessive compulsion forces you to make the journey, don't fly with an airline headed by someone with a name like Dick Fluck.
Dick it seems, is listed as the head monkey for an airline calling itself COMTEL, an Austrian based outfit with two airplanes at their disposal.
At their disposal however's not quite the same as owning the two airplanes is it?
No - that distinction goes to a Madrid based outfit called Mint Aviation who owned the 18 year old birds that will factor into this story that we'll eventually get around to telling.
Neither of these two fine outfits however were the outfits whose names were on tickets sold to the general public - that distinction goes to SKYJET and ASTONBURY, two UK based outfits that predictably on November 17th, folded faster than the Liberal Party of Canada.
On the morning of November 15th, Lal and 200 or so of his fellow travellers boarded the Comtel/Mint/Skyjet/Astonbury flight in Amritsar with the goal of arriving in Birmingham some ten hours later.
Armed with their web receipts for the flight and a few bits of coinage to cover on board costs such as purchasing safety demonstration cards and washroom vouchers, few could contain their giddiness in anticipation of letting Mother Nature water the Birmingham gardens for the next six months.
Except of course for Bubba Johnson in seat 21D who would soon discover that his web booking skills weren't going to get him home to Birmingham, Alabama quite as soon as he'd anticipated.
For most, the first sense that something was a tad amiss came when passengers noticed after landing that everyone on the ground looked like cast members from The Sound of Music.
Snow capped mountains at the edge of the runway coupled with the announcement "Welcome to Vienna" added a nice touch to the mystery as well.
It was when flight attendants began passing the hat to cover fuel and other costs that concern began to set in.
Except for Bubba in 21 D who came to realize that Momma was really 'gonna give him a whooppin' if he missed Turkey Day.
As the story began to unfold, it seems that Comtel owed a few folks a few dollars.
Some creditors went as far as to suggest that Comtel's president - Tricky Dick - had Flucked them over once too often and decided to hold the aircraft and the passengers somewhat captive until an amount said to be roughly $40,000 was collected in cash - and turned over by the passengers to the crew.
Passengers were advised the only way they'd be permitted to continue on to Birmingham would be to pony up.
Most agreed - Bubba however indicated he'd need to use an ATM in the terminal which is of course the last anyone on that flight saw of Mrs Johnson's boy.
A day late and few dollars short, the Boeing 757 landed in Birmingham and before discharging the passengers, presented each one of them with autographed crew photos to commemorate two milestones:
1. It was the 1st recorded hi-jacking of passengers by an airline itself
2 It was pretty much the last flight sold through SKYJET who unceremoniously shut down a couple of days ago.
Dick Fluck and the cast of Comtel will have - I suspect - a bit of a tough go over the next little while.
That said - their website's still up and running and under the Welcome Aboard section it says, and I kid you not here folks - "Enjoy our unique service during your flight."
Mint Aviation, the owners of these aircraft, have reclaimed their planes and are currently retrofitting them with a new type of seatback in-flight entertainment system that's coin operated.
It shows the usual route maps, 4th run movies, day old sandwich selections etc, but a new feature will allow passengers to view the amount of debt accrued by whichever outfit decides to charter these birds in the future.
When it reaches a certain level - a fuel gauge will appear on the screen and as the needle edges closer to E, passengers will have the opportunity to insert coins into the slot to keep things in the air.
For the convenience of passengers, each aircraft will be outfitted with ATM's as well as credit card point of sale processors.
As for Bubba?
Seems he made it home in time for the holidays.
He's planning his next trip on Google.
Off to Australia in January.
Not quite sure if I should fire off an e-mail to him as a reminder that there's more than one Sydney.........
Nah.
If a tourist from Birmingham UK survived his oops a couple of years ago winding up in Nova Scotia instead of Australia as a result of his on line expertise - let's leave Bubba be.

Adios until next time

Dave Heron

Dave Heron is the owner and operator of: Pace Setter Travel & Tours (1995) Inc; P.O. Box 612, 70 McRae Street, Okotoks.
Tel: 403.938.5454
Toll Free: 1.800.206.7223.
Fax: 403.938.5568
Email: pacesetter@nucleus.com